To Do List or To Be Done List

Today, my boyfriend and I had a very frank assessment of life and the conclusion is: I AM WASTING MY LIFE AWAY. Now, my excuse for this is a serious lack of motivation and completely no drive at all. I mean, every one has these episodes of being so jaded and not wanting to do anything, feeling like you're drifting away in space. I on the other hand, have complete seasons of tofu moments where I literally live in my bed and waste my life away. It's not as bad as I make it sound like, but it's pretty accurate(Kinda)! Now, when you have a boyfriend like mine, having anything less than exciting and fulfilling life is frowned upon, however extreme that may be.

Therefore, here is my To Do List or To Be Done List.  (Because people usually ignore to do lists...)

THIS WEEK

1. Drink 3 bottles of water every day
2. Do my own manicure
3. Learn 10 French words
4. Write a complete article
5. Be a tour guide to my UK friend
6. Draw funny faces on all the eggs in my fridge

Now, these may seem very little, but it's small steps that counts! My bucket list is still being built up and you can see them here and here. If your life is boring, try making lists. If not, go draw funny faces on all the eggs in your fridge. 

Why do people seek casual sex? Is it always about love?

[Here's a little something I wrote...]

Firstly, it must be made clear that sex is not love, nor is love given through sex. However, it is not a common knowledge to all and hence may be the reason to the pandemic of casual sex. It is common sense to link sex to intimacy as it is an act that is frequently performed with as much fervor as gentleness. Yet many cannot establish the connection between Love and Sex. Therefore in the attempt to seek one, one performs the other without so much a thought as to the complications that comes with it. 

Many people have casual sex for many reasons. For some, it is to quench the deep loneliness they are living with. To them, sex is like honey to bitter tea, and the only way to stave off the bitterness is to add more honey. To some others, it is a quest to find true love, a quest in which they have decided that they will succeed in finding what they want if they do it enough. Some people have even less regard for the delicacy in sex, in which they seek casual sex just because they can and no reason else. There are many more reasons be they queer or common, but as to each their own, so are the reasons unique to themselves. Hence, it cannot be always about love if the reasons for casual sex are so abundantly scattered. 

However,  we may link casual sex to seeking intimacy as it is generally the case in most scenarios. Sex can give a psychical closeness to a person such as no other acts can. It heightens the human senses and releases endorphins that makes a person feel wonderfully blissful and contented. This may be why people seek casual sex out frequently: To feel the powerful effects sex gives them, be it feelings of triumph, love and the likes. Hence, many go at it with such enthusiasm that it almost seems like a drug to them, that they must have sex over and over to achieve such intimacy. Yet, these people are searching for something that sex itself may not be able to give them. It may be argued that these people are merely searching for love in the acts of intimacy, but that does not explain the reasons of people who have sex merely because they can. I suspect many people go after sex as if they are going after love itself, but in the pursuit of one, people have come to lose the importance of the other and perhaps the connection between them. Sex is not Love, nor is Love given through sex. They are as mutually inclusive as they are exclusive. Some find that they can continue to love without having such acts of intimacy and some find that they cannot love even with all the sexual satisfaction in the world. It is because of the little understanding of this phenomena that people go about having casual sex. It is not because it is wrong or right, nor is it entirely about love. It is somewhat a combination of both and the desire to seek out something that they don’t truly understand and try to grasp it in those few moments of physical bliss.